Tuesday, April 21, 2009

little you and i

long time, no blog.

I’ve been working on a blog about my cat for, like, a month. But I don’t think I’m ever going to finish it. I write one sentence and then I hit save because I’m just too damn sad to write any more. My cat is old. The phrase “decisions will have to be made” has been used more than once and I don’t like it. She’s deaf and now we think she’s going blind. She cries a lot. The thing about cats is that they’re not like grandparents. When they get to be 80something in cat years you don’t feel consoled that they’ve lived a long full life. Because even though your cat may be 80 in cat years to you she’s only 16 and it is not okay to die when you’re sixteen.

So, yeah, I’ve decided to blog about other things because if I keep trying to blog about my cat I’m never going to write again.
Thursday was a really good day. Took an early train into the city. Had Chipotle with Sadie and my name twin. Oh, how I love Chipotle. Michelle went back to work and Sadie and I walked to stogo. And as we sat on the bench in front of stogo eating some AMAZING organic vegan ice cream and judging passersby on a beautiful spring day I couldn’t help but wonder how I could ever even contemplate going so far from this city I love so damn much. Then we went to the tiny studio apartment with an alley view that Sadie’s friend pays almost $2k a month for and I remembered why exactly it is I am getting the hell out of dodge. It was a bittersweet day because even though I’ll be going into the city plenty more times before the big move this was the first time that it felt like I was starting to say goodbye.
My cat keeps walking around, crying and then lying down.
I’m too sad to blog.

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