This is the moment they're always talking about in movies. The sun is rising behind her face, tendrils of light touching on her hair so that blonde is transformed to gold; she glitters as she starts to wake up.
Sarah turns toward me, scrunching down our sleeping bag with her caterpillar crawl so that goosebumps spread out across my bare shoulders. But I don't mind. She smiles with her eyes closed, yawns, full mouth to the world, and when she presses into me all of the chill is gone. The goosebumps remain.
I stare at the golden glow of her, the light that I have to remind myself that she is borrowing. Somehow though, I feel that she would be luminous even in the pitch black of a cave. Science be damned.
This is the moment, the 'I just knew' moment that reaches back and rewrites history so that from now on I feel as if somehow, some part of me has always 'just known.'
Sarah mumbles something into my chest and it takes every ounce of willpower I've ever earned to peel myself away from her. I pull on jeans, grab a t-shirt and step out of the tent to start a fire for breakfast. I'm making pancakes if I can ever figure out how any of this is supposed to work. Sarah is walking towards me before the kindling even starts to smoke. As soon as she takes over, sparks fly up.
Her blue eyes are grey as she holds a hand up to shield them from the fire and the sun fighting to get to her through the trees. She is full of such surprising beauty in even the smallest moments that I swear I'm going to burst trying to breathe it all in.
I want to spend the rest of my life in this moment. Armageddon will come and go and we'll still be here standing between the fire she built and the tent I didn't quite put together right, feeling the universe move through us.
I have just enough breath for one word. "Pancakes?"
Her smile is mysterious and sad and gone from the right side of her mouth before the left side knows what it's doing.
"You didn't pack the griddle."
"I remembered the blueberries though, your favorite. We could walk into town, buy a griddle."
"Or just forget the pancakes. There's plenty else we-"
I step towards her and she backs away. She stumbles but catches herself before falling towards the flames.
"I really should be getting home."